Images and Words

“Reality lies beyond the horizon…” That’s been my mantra for over half my life. The saying—yes, with the ellipsis because it proves that reality isn’t final in this moment—came about the same time as my self-appointed nickname “Wonderwegian.”

When I was seventeen I dubbed my room WONDERLAND and inhabited my kingdom with Wonderlonians. I’ll omit the embarrassing titles I gave my favorite people but let you know I had everything from court jesters to royal exiles. And Wonderland was covered with pictures of people, places and artwork that inspired me. I even had items hanging from the ceiling!

Besides covering my walls with images, I placed several quotes in key locations. Most were hand written in calligraphy on index cards and they were everything from lyrics to writing quotes. One of them stated “Reality lies beyond the horizon… -Wonderwegian.” There was also a paragraph-length exposition on that theme I wrote with the input of my pen pal Justin Williams, but I can’t locate it right now. (However Justin did locate me on Facebook two years ago. Hello!)

I’ve tried to “grow-up” décor wise since getting married and what was once a room-size collage is now crammed onto an 8×5 bulletin board. I’m wondering if increasing the space of visually inspiring images would produce more written work.

What are your thoughts?

Can you work in a room like that (okay, maybe minus the Nelson poster—though it does have three autographs now) or do you need calming negative space?

P.S. If you insist in knowing, I’ll give you one title: Thor was guardian of the realm.

CORRODED Soundtrack, 2nd Edition

Nearly a year ago I posted my soundtrack listing for Corroded.
After spending months revising the story this spring-summer, I took a good look at my musical influence. I rearranged, deleted similar songs as well as those that weren’t 100% on target, and even added a special song.
It was difficult culling the list, but it needed to be done. I love music, and the songs I had on the original listing did help inspire my writing moods, but they weren’t all perfect matches.
The new song addition was in response to my early readers’ love of a certain character. Team Ben! Everyone who has read the manuscript connects to Ben so I felt that even though Corroded is told strictly from Mary’s point of view, Ben’s voice is strong enough to merit his own song on the soundtrack.

So, here it is, complete with new tidbits and YouTube videos for your pleasure: Corroded, Second Edition!

Hello Mary Lou (Main character’s name, with classic Ricky Nelson.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLkCWT2neuI

The Very Thought of You (He was so smooth and dreamy. This one is from Mary to Josh.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkHu7C3puWI

You Are a Tourist (How Mary feels at school.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UM4Mmd2y4nE

Burning Down Inside (Great live version from last year. Love knowing that bands can still rock years/decades after their songs came out.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yImjBG7qFTw

Dying to Be Alive (Enjoy these guys lots and it fits the mood.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjTNACA_VVk

Somewhere I Belong (The deep search all teens go through.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iCtpuQvydk

I’m the One (Mitch Malloy is my absolute FAVORITE singer/songwriter! Check out his other music and enjoy! This is Ben’s song—swoon away!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7KM46JkHO0

Start from the Dark (By my FAVORITE band and this video has a comic book spin that I think Ben would approve of—even if it isn’t The Avengers.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gyg-x1DMHs8

Spirit of the Underdog (For Mary at the Sailor Suzy competition. Love this song and Joey Tempest is a maniac with the mic stand.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BpH1-r-JDmw

Life (In closing, I was fortunate enough to catch a Ricky Nelson Remembered concert in April 2012. R.I.P. Rick, and may the twins keep your memories alive for the next generation.)

Still Here

It’s been an ebb and flow of family and friends lately.

Laughter and tears.

Wiggles and giggles.

A thousand mile road trip in our new-used car, packed to the gills with luggage and kids.


Living in a hotel room for ten days and being adopted by the staff.

Meeting extended family members for the first time and saying good-bye to others.

Homeschool, social gatherings and sending the youngest boy off to preschool.

And that little princess… she turns TWO next weekend!

I haven’t been reading or writing blogs for over a month. But, I’m ready to jump back on track and ride this blog out to the end of the year—and beyond.

Keep your chin up and smile!

“Life is like a box of chocolates…”

At this point in my life I’m eating from the “bittersweet” section.
Most of you know that my oldest child is “special needs”. He suffers from a dysfunctional immune system, which causes neurological interruptions (N.I.D.S.). He has outwardly autistic behaviors as well as internal medical conditions (an active viral infection, food allergies, trouble regulating his body temperature, etc). He’s been developmentally delayed since toddlerhood. He’ll be eleven years old this summer but he’s behind his peers in almost all categories and subjects. But he’s also the sweetest kid I know, artistically inclined, and a joy to be with. He’s doing a great service in my life, teaching me more about the world and myself (things I embrace and things I’d rather not deal with, but we are where we’re at for a reason.)
Since he is my oldest I didn’t know what to expect and therefore didn’t know what I was missing when he failed to reach developmental milestones. Through years of medical intervention and close monitoring of blood work he is showing improvements, both on the numbers showing in his lab work and his developing of new skills and abilities.
Now with my three and a half year old son I’m seeing the miraculous blossoming of a healthy child. He’s not asking the magic “Why?” questions every other minute, but wonders how, where, and when things happen. And that’s when he’s not busy telling me what he’s going to be when he grows up. (Within the last week he’s declared he’s going to be a skyscraper builder, firefighter, race care driver, and concrete mixer.) This little guy is already “writing” letters to his friends and actively seeking information on anything and everything.
I’m experiencing all the stages my oldest missed because his body was sick and he wasn’t able to learn/develop along the typical growth chart. I’m watching little brother surpass older brother with language, socialization, and imagination.
I’m seeing just how much my oldest is trapped in his own world. I’m realizing that after all the gains he’s made over the past seven and a half years of treatment he’s still grossly behind his peers… and even behind his younger brother.
I’m criticizing myself for slacking off my efforts with him during the past few years, feeling I’ve neglected the oldest by dividing my time to care for the younger two.
I’m over-whelmed with all the hours and effort I’m needing to put in with him to help him be better able to have a higher quality of life.
I’m aching for the world to see the beautiful soul who peeks out from my son amid the chaotic symptoms of a harsh illness.
But thankfully I’m accepting the massive journey ahead of us and recommitting myself to the up-hill climb.

25 Random Things

25 Random Things
I have a phone phobia. If you’ve ever gotten a call from me, consider yourself lucky.
I had both nails on my big toes removed when I was 18 due to nail-bed damage.
I want to get the rest of my toenails removed. I use to work at a retirement village and thought it was sad the seniors had to wait all month for a podiatrist to come by to clip their toe nails because they could reach them to do it themselves. I don’t want to have to worry about my toenails as I age.
I like the transitional seasons-Spring and Fall- better than the extremes of Summer and Winter.
“Care Bear” is my most widely used nickname. It’s been used at home, school, and work through out the years.
Before I was married I wanted 5-6 kids. After having one I changed my mind to 2-3 so I think I’m maxed out.
I think it’s easier to answer quiz questions than come up with 25 random things…
I’ve never used a tanning bed, and I don’t plan on doing so.
I had a “Tiny Toons” lunch box during high school.
I have no middle name.
The only graduation ceremony I participated in was for Middle School.
I’ve got no class. High school graduation class, that is. But I usually put class of ’94 because that’s what I would have been…
I have an Associate Degree in Liberal Arts and Sciences, earned December 1995.
Keep thinking about dying my hair but I’m too chicken.
I’ve worn a fake “suicide chain” (chain connecting a nose ring to an earring) on several occasions- though I don’t think there is photographic evidence. And yes, it was in public. Teenagers!
Never had my ears, or anything, else pierced. And don’t plan to.
Fearful of needles.
I’m a weak swimmer.
Scared of most fires/flames.
Small candles are okay in moderation.
I think I’m running out of steam…
I use a Franklin Covey day planner to keep myself on task.
I’m a habitual list maker.
There are currently 5 aquariums/tanks housing fish/reptiles/etc in my house right now.
I wish there were only two aquariums…

Belated "Turkey Blog"

I wrote this on Thanksgiving and posted it to my Facebook page. Thought it would be a good place to start with my Blog on here. When I do post, I’ll most likely shorten names for privacy reasons, but those who truly know me will most liekly be able to tell who it is I’m referring to. Happy Reading!
November 27, 2008:
On this day of giving thanks I’m reflecting on the year and noticed that there are only thirty-four days left in 2008. Thirty-four! It’s amazing to realize all that I’ve been involved in and where I’m at now on this road called life. In January I was working at Books-A-Million part-time and enjoying my time out of the house. I was surrounded by my favorite non-human things to love, books! It was my third time in less than a dozen years working at the store. The last two times I was hired the management at the store was gracious enough to do the unspeakable in the world of corporate retail… give me as many (or as little) hours as I wanted, whenever I wanted them.
After just three months (I’d started October 2007) I had to give my two weeks notice. J’s work schedule switched to twelve hour days and it didn’t allow for time/energy for him to care for the kids while I worked. Plus I discovered that I was pregnant- which is why I left the bookstore the previous times. So good-bye to employee discounts, once again. In February, I started watching two of my nephews four days a week. That allowed me to bring in some needed money but be able to stay at home, especially nice on those days/nights of “morning sickness”. N and I had fun with his “cousin buddies”, and A, too, when he wasn’t in school.
In April I had an ultrasound showing the baby is a girl… so the purple and pink planning began. And J lost his job, and was out of work for two months. Joy.
June included a fabulous trip to the greater Boston area without kids (or husband), compliments of my oldest sister. A was sweet enough to drive me around to all the literary and architectural spots of my choosing. (J was happy he wasn’t there to suffer through those locations, but he was busy with a new job and night classes.) The cooler weather of the Northeast was a much needed break from the summer humidity while six months pregnant. Plus the experience of flying first class was great in itself!
July was a great month for personal goals. I participated in an on-line writing challenge hosted by Laurie Halse Anderson, one of my favorite writers. The challenge was to write at least 15 minutes a day, all month long. I only missed three days, and they were all Sundays, so I didn’t feel guilty. (Who ever said the Sabbath is a day of rest never worked in Primary/Jr. Sunday School!) I started back to work on a story I began in 2001 and wrote an average of a page a day. It was wonderful to get back into the creative process of writing regularly. But I’m sorry to say, I let it slip away after the month was over. Excuses of being a mother of a two active boys and being pregnant are valid, but not worth whining about. My fault!
I kept my nephews through the end of July. That allowed me two weeks with A and N before school started for the eldest and a month and a half off from “work” before the newest was born. As if moms get time off… well, I did, in June! :) And I was released as the Primary President of our congregation, a post I’d filled for nearly five years.
September brought the birth of S, a week after my first (hopefully only!) trip to the hospital with false labor. My heaviest baby, she beat N by half an ounce, at 9 lbs 15 oz. But she was an inch shorter, at 22 inches. (A was only 8 lbs 12 oz and 21.5 inches.)
It’s been great to have a frilly girl with crazy red hair. Hopefully her hair stays red, or at least red-tinted. I always wanted red hair, and it’s just in the last decade or so become more strawberry-ish… though it keeps getting darker, plus the forever multiplying white/gray hairs are taking over… but that’s another topic.
October was a month of juggling and routine making. Adjusting to life being out-numbered by kids. Having more children than hands takes lots of getting used to… but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Not even another vacation. :)
Earlier this month I bravely traveled to New Orleans with N and S, plus the help of a dear friend. We drove the 3.5 hours (with stops) to see Laurie Halse Anderson (the author mentioned in the July happenings) at a book signing event. She was sweet enough to ask ME if I was “Wonderwegian” and if she could get a picture with ME. Thankfully N and S cooperated and their weren’t any rush-from-the-bookstore-with-a-screaming kid-moments. L.H.A. signed six novels for me, two picture books for S, and two novels for Christmas gifts.
Yesterday I attempted a portrait shooting to capture all three kids that would be worthy of copying for Christmas cards. There is one decent picture out of the two dozen attempts but I think I’ll try one more time. And today, being Thanksgiving, I’ve been thinking about my blessings and accomplishments. At the beginning of the year I committed myself to goals in eight different categories (physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, social, family, financial, and professional) to try for a real-rounded life. Isn’t there a quote saying “Reach for the stars. Even if you miss you’ll end up among the stars” or something like that? Well, I reached all right. Out of my eight goals, I’m on track for one- family. I know I won’t reach/complete the other ones in the next thirty-four days but I know I’ll be enjoying this season of magic and beginning the new year in a better position than I ended 2007.